Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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