you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
We are two peas in an std pod
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
