Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i dont even know how to be here
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
