I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
