Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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