problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Life is so much better after having sex.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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