Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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