is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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