I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
