dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
3pm strippers are depressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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