You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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