She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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