I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
i will never coherently bang her
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
