How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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