Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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