That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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