1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize