oh god the rape fog is back!
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
My vagina is very pro this idea
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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