That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
