About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
