I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize