i jhust puked up my retainher.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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