You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Randomize
