Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
being pregnant is like rehab
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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