You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize