More tranny stories later!
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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