P.S. I can't hear my feet
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I queefed so loud it echoed.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Randomize