Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize