How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
