After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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