Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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