I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Randomize
