i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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