A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
