Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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