Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
