when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
soo... how was my night?
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