He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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