Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
