is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
