You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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