btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
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