Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
