I didn't shave. On purpose
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize