She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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