That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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