No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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