We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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