we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize