This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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